Ever-Changing Reflection

Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding... It is the bitter potion by which the physician within you heals your sick self. Therefore trust the physician, and drink his remedy in silence and tranquility.
~ Kahlil Gibran

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Today I ran.

Today I ran. I ran because it's what I know how to do. I ran because it's how I manage my thoughts. I ran because it's how I cope with my feelings. I ran because I miss it. I ran because it feels good. I ran because it hurts. I ran because I can.

Because I have two legs that can run, and that's what they know how to do.

This was my first run in over a month and only my third run in the last four months. I am three days late for the B.A.A. 5k and a day late for all of the memorial runs, but it was the first day I felt ready to run. It wasn't easy, and it hurt just a little bit, but every step reminded me of how grateful I am. And with every step, I thought of how terrifying running was Monday afternoon.

I ran wearing my B.A.A. shirt, and when the chaos clears from Copley Square, I will run the B.A.A. 5k course. Originally, I was running it for me, so I could say I did it, so I could complete the Distance Medley this year. Now, I will run it as my memorial run, and I will finish where it ended for three young people who didn't deserve the fate handed to them.

Today I ran. Because this is the only way I know how to cope.

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